The Anti-To-Do List: Anchors Leaders Need to Release

Leadership often feels like moving through heavy waters. You’ve got a destination, but invisible anchors, the habits, distractions, and obligations keep dragging you back. The truth is: it’s not just what you do that shapes your leadership, it’s what you don’t do.

Sahil Bloom puts it well:

“Where your To-Do List has the set of daily actions that drive you forward, your Anti-To-Do List has the set of daily actions, behaviors, and habits to avoid; the things that will hold you back or lead you into trouble.”

I love this framing because it acknowledges a reality many leaders quietly wrestle with: it’s often not the big, strategic things holding us back, but the small, draining things we never name or challenge.

Why Leaders Need an Anti-To-Do List

Some leaders struggle because they don’t know what to do. The path forward feels foggy and uncertain. Others know exactly what needs to be done, but their time and energy keep leaking into distractions, obligations, or habits that pull them off course.

And often, it’s both. You can be clear on your priorities and still get stuck in the noise. You can feel uncertain and default to filling the gap with busywork. Either way, the result is the same: frustration, exhaustion, and loneliness.

The Anti-To-Do List is a chance to plug those leaks and clear the fog. It’s not about control for the sake of efficiency; it’s about creating space for presence, clarity, and connection.

And here’s the important part: your Anti-To-Do List isn’t just professional. It’s personal. Your energy, vision, and leadership are shaped by how you manage yourself, both at work and at home.

Stories of Anchors in Action

Picture this: a leader who accepts every meeting invite out of a desire to be helpful and accessible. By the end of the week, their calendar is packed wall to wall, but none of the strategic initiatives they care about have moved forward.

The anchor isn’t incompetence. It’s a simple habit: saying “yes” without filtering for impact. Once “Don’t attend meetings that don’t need me” goes on the Anti-To-Do List, space opens up, and with it, renewed energy and focus. The shift is noticeable to everyone around them.

That’s the power of naming your anchors; they go from invisible drains to visible choices.

What Might Go on a Leader’s Anti-To-Do List?

Here are a few examples, combining Sahil Bloom’s insights with what I see in leadership every day:

Professional Anchors to Avoid

• Don’t default to busywork. “Grazing” on emails, Slack, or low-value tasks is like putting your foot on the gas while the parking brake is on.

• Don’t say yes just because you hope you’ll have more time later. You won’t. Decline with clarity.

• Don’t avoid hard conversations. Discomfort now prevents distrust later.

• Don’t attend meetings that don’t need you. Presence matters more than attendance.

Personal Anchors to Avoid

• Don’t sacrifice sleep for productivity. A tired brain isn’t a strategic brain.

• Don’t let exercise, movement, or fresh air fall off the list. Your energy is fuel, not a luxury.

• Don’t carry other people’s stress as your own. Compassion without boundaries is a recipe for burnout.  (Guilty 🙋‍♀️)

• Don’t isolate yourself when you’re overwhelmed. Leadership is lonely enough; reach out before the silence swallows you.

The Loneliness Link

There’s a deeper layer here: loneliness. Many leaders don’t admit how heavy it feels to carry everything alone. But when your Anti-To-Do List is blank, loneliness has room to grow. You keep saying yes, you keep swallowing stress, you keep wearing the mask of “I’ve got this.”

An Anti-To-Do List is more than productivity; it’s a connection. Every time you write down “Don’t isolate myself when overwhelmed” or “Don’t avoid reaching out when I need perspective,” you’re giving yourself permission to break the silence.

Leadership doesn’t have to be lonely, but it will be if you carry the anchors by yourself.

Building Yours

Here’s the beauty: the Anti-To-Do List isn’t about guilt or shame. It’s about awareness. It’s a mirror.

1. Name 3–5 anchors you’ll release this month. Keep it simple, specific, and visible.

2. Pair it with your To-Do List. Every time you plan your day, scan your Anti-To-Do List too.

3. Celebrate the release. Progress is about avoiding the boxes that drain you.

4. Evolve as you grow. As your clarity strengthens, new anchors may surface. Update your list regularly.

A Shared Practice

I’ll be honest: I haven’t built mine yet either. I’ll be creating my own Anti-To-Do List this month, and I’d love for you to join me.

👉 What belongs on your Anti-To-Do List? Hit reply or hop over to LinkedIn and join the conversation there. I’d love to hear and share ideas. Leaders, we don’t have to carry this alone.